✨ The Thing I Still Struggle With — Even After 20 Years of Healing

Here’s something really personal for lunchtime today…

I talk a lot about the progress I’ve made, the tools I use, and the ways I’ve learned to live with anxiety — but there’s one thing I still struggle with, even after 20 years of healing:

The fear that I’ll go backwards.

Even on good days, that thought will sneak in like a shadow:

“What if the panic comes back the way it used to?”

“What if all the work I’ve done disappears?”

“What if I fall right back into that old version of me?”

It’s honestly one of the hardest parts of recovery — not the panic itself, but the fear of the panic.

But here’s the truth I’ve learned, over and over:

Healing isn’t a straight line. It never was. Some days I’m strong. Some days I’m scared. And most days, I’m a mix of both.

And that doesn’t mean I’m failing.

It means I’m human.

It means I’m still growing.

It means I’m self-aware enough to notice when the fear shows up — and gentle enough with myself to keep moving anyway.

If you feel this too… if you’re afraid of slipping backwards or losing progress… I want you to know this:

You’re not alone.

You’re not broken.

You’re not starting over.

You’re just continuing the work.

And that takes strength most people will never understand.

✨ If you need support, I made some resources just for this journey:

• Free Anxiety Workbook (638 downloads and counting)

• My book, Calm & Confident — available on my blog, Amazon, Kindle & Audible

• My Calm & Confident Course — Christmas sale until Dec 24 with code CALMCLUB15

I’m proud of you for being here.

And honestly? Today, I’m proud of me too. ❤️