Something on my “to-do list” that never gets done?
Rest.
Not the cute, aesthetic kind.
The real kind.
The kind where I don’t feel guilty for sitting still.
The kind where my brain actually shuts up for a minute.
That’s been on my list for years.
Every day I tell myself I’ll rest after I catch up.
After I finish work.
After I respond to everyone.
After I’m less anxious.
After I’m doing better.
But the truth is…
when you live with anxiety, there is no “after.”
The list just keeps growing.
And rest keeps getting pushed to the bottom.
Some days I don’t rest because I can’t.
Other days I don’t rest because I don’t feel like I deserve to.
And that’s the part no one talks about.
Lately, I’m trying something different.
Not fixing everything.
Not calming my mind completely.
Just stopping for a moment anyway.
Even if my chest is tight.
Even if my thoughts are loud.
Even if nothing feels finished.
Rest doesn’t mean everything is okay.
It just means I’m still here.
And I’m trying.
If this writing helps you feel a little less alone, you can buy me a coffee and support my work here ☕
Every coffee helps me keep writing, keep sharing, and keep showing up.
💚
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